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Post by Xena on Jun 11, 2010 18:04:14 GMT -5
Spam anyone? In a can? In a hat? In the shape of a bat? Well... Look! Poet and didn't know it!
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Post by Princess Daphne on Jun 21, 2010 7:08:36 GMT -5
Haha!
*Takes out fighting staff*
"Death to the spam!"
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Post by Xena on Jul 1, 2010 14:38:19 GMT -5
Spam-a-lam-a-ding-dong!
"You shall taste my wooden table."
*Takes the spam and starts polishing the wooden table*
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Post by Princess Daphne on Jul 6, 2010 17:10:34 GMT -5
*Slams the staff to stop the polishing*
Why you fix that table?!
*Grabs some mud*
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Post by Xena on Jul 28, 2010 17:51:44 GMT -5
It is a dirty table. *grabs hold of staff and moves it out of the way*
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Post by Princess Daphne on Aug 4, 2010 12:53:27 GMT -5
*Trows the mud in hand at Xena* Haha!
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Post by Joxer the Mighty on Aug 7, 2010 9:19:31 GMT -5
While sitting at another table off to the side, with his men, he begins pounding his fists on the table... his men follow suit as they chant:
"Spam, Spam, Spam... Wonderful Spam... Spam, Spam, Spam..."
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Post by Xena on Aug 10, 2010 15:00:29 GMT -5
*Wipes mud off of face*
"That voice." Xena looks in the direction of the voice and sees Joxer. Xena pulls her chakrum and tosses it in the direction of Joxer. It bounces off of several items before knocking Joxer's hat off his head and returning to Xena's hand.
"Remember me?"
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Post by Joxer the Mighty on Aug 11, 2010 0:44:37 GMT -5
"Remeber you? Can't say that I do, should I?" He said as he stood up and retrieved his hat... "Tell me, where pray tell should I know you from my dear, certainly not my bed chamber!" his men roared with laghter at ths remark, of course they were also very drunk...
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Post by Xena on Aug 11, 2010 13:27:23 GMT -5
"Look princess, the scumbags think their leader is so terribly witty. They couldn't be more right either, which proves I was wrong about them being empty headed as that was one of the worst jokes I've ever heard."
Xena walks up behind Joxer, leans down and whispers; "Does Amphipolis or the name Xena ring any bells?" Xena placed a strong hand on Joxer's shoulder near his neck. She squeezed hard as to where some bones could be heard cracking. "If anyone moves I put the pinch on your leader, he dies, then so do the rest of you." Xena stated firmly and swiftly as she looked at the men at the table.
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Post by Princess Daphne on Aug 11, 2010 14:13:58 GMT -5
All men are pigs. Daphne thought as she heard the reply from the man that Xena had used her weapon on to knock of his hat. Daphne leaned on her staff as she watched Xena. She wondered why not just pie him. Plenty of mud, or shove the spam table polisher down his throat.
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Post by Joxer the Mighty on Aug 11, 2010 14:29:45 GMT -5
A sly smile crept across Joxer's face as the woman's grip on his neck relaxed that pinched nerve he had been having trouble with...
"Amphipolis, you say..."
He moved quickly, turning out of her grasp and at the same time grabbing her arm and bending it around behind her, then it was his turn to whisper into her ear...
"My dear child, I know this city... or should I say what was left of it when we were done."
He tightened his grip, pulling her arm nearly out of it's socket before pushing her across the room.
"You may remember that event as the day Joxer the Merciless ruined your life, but to me..."
He chuckled
"... It was Tuesday."
His men let out an even louder roar of laughter than last time as their leader returned to the table and picked up his cup
"Now I have tried to amend the way I conduct my business, I no longer ravage festering little villages that can barely survive on their own. Had I made that decision sooner, your town may have been spared, at least by me, but there is always another warlord to take the pace of the last one... It would do you well to remember that, as for your loss..."
He shrugged
"...It's in the past, why not leave it buried there with the men of your village and live your life, what's left of it. Get married, raise a family, do something useful with what you have. Because if you continue to pick fights with strangers, one of them may just kill you without a second thought..."
While he spoke he had been walking around the table, when he finished talking he stood at the end of it with a mud pie in his hands...
"And by the way dear lady..."
e tossed a well aimed mud pie at her head
"...Here's mud in your eye."
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Post by Xena on Aug 14, 2010 17:04:05 GMT -5
Antispating him grabbing her Xena went along with it. Not many people could get their hands on her and keep her still without her letting them, even if it did cause some discomfort. Sometimes it was worth it. When he whispered into her ear Xena crinkled her nose. She had a keen sense of smell. Whatever Joxer had eaten, well, lets just say he could use a weeks worth of that stuff called mint, and not to mention...a bath.
"You? Make ammends? It's impossible for a son of a bochaye like you to do something as nobal as that."
Xena scoffed. Though the mention of family, it looked as if she had, had a flashback. That image she had briefly remembered was something only between her and a centaur.
Xena wiped the mud off her face. She then pick up a fresh pie that had just been set down in front of one of his men, and she pushed that man over, and he landed head first to a large pot making him unconsious.
Xena threw the pie, and hit Joxer straight in the face. He was not the only one with precision aim.
"And you just got creamed." Xena said as she used an index finger to wipe a little of the side of his face and taste it. "Banana to be exact."
Looking to Daphne. "Ready princess?" Xena asked with a sly smile.
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Post by Ares on Aug 16, 2010 21:10:02 GMT -5
Ares appears behind Joxer...
"Your not actually going to take that from... HER... are you? You, a great warlord, commander of armies... letting a little girl like that have the last word?"
He shakes his head
"And here I thought I was backing a winner..."
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Post by Xena on Aug 16, 2010 23:03:05 GMT -5
Xena quickly drew her sword, as she smelled a very familiar stench to the air. Ares appeared behind Joxer.
Xena moves and for her own enjoyment sticks her sword into Ares gut. "I kind of like the placement." She commented as she smiled at Ares. It had been a while since she'd interacted with the subterrian scum.
"I guess good help or rather 'bad' help in your case Ares is hard to come by. What with you helping to train me then me deciding not to do things your way anymore." Xena shrugged.
"And what's in it for you if we fight, beside entertainment. I know you don't care about anyone in here but yourself, and that your comment was meant to provoke a fight."
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